Zombie Squirrels and One Liners: My adventures at the
Edinburgh Fringe
By
Lyndsey Connell
It’s the 20th August 2011. The sun is blazing, the streets are thronged and I am more than a little sleep deprived. I am in Edinburgh with my friends Jacqui and Clare and within minutes we have decided that we are going to pack in our jobs and move to this pretty, sunny energy-filled city. Maybe we wouldn’t have felt the same had we landed on a bitterly cold, wet, miserable day in November, but for now, we are on our holidays and there are sights to see and shows to attend!
Our first day contained only one show, and I shall not speak of it as it was an utter shambles. Let me tell you though- the shambolic ones only increase your appreciation for the well thought out and entertaining ones. I will try not to bore you too much and give you instead the Highlights of the Edinburgh Fringe According to Me.
Celebrity Stalking
Of course that’s a joke! I would never stalk anyone! Ever! Honest….
Anyway, if you were so inclined, being that pretty much every comedian in the UK and Ireland decamp to Edinburgh (as well as hundreds of other performers) for the month of August, this is the time and place to indulge. Gasp as you spot Paul Merton walking back from the loos in the Pleasance Courtyard! Gape as you clock David O’Doherty walking down the street! Faint with excitement as you notice Anneka Rice in the window of a restaurant you’re passing by!
All that’s pretty impressive right? Well prepare to puke with jealousy when I tell you that we met and had our photo taken with Tim Vine after his show in the Pleasance AND met and had our photo taken with Dave Gorman (my second favourite Jewish comedian) Both lovely, both absolute gentlemen.
Recovered from that? Then it’s time to let you in on another:
Lashings and Lashings of Ginger Beer!
What can you drink when the Bulmers Pear Cider tastes distinctly of apple? When beer is making your tummy upset? Why, Crabbie’s Ginger Beer of course! And, no, I am not being paid by the company to advertise its tasty beverage (more’s the pity). To our delight, fizzy gingery goodness was available in most pubs and if you have any respect for your tastebuds I urge you to join me in campaigning to bring these bottles of happiness to every pub in Dublin. You have the power!
People
The public. I deal with them every day in my job. They’re the worst. Really. They are awful. Obnoxious, self-important, boorish gits, every single one. Did I encounter such horrors in Edinburgh? Happily, no! I’m not saying they don’t exist, and perhaps if I was working behind one of the many bars, or at the box office, I might have a different story to tell. But considering the population of Edinburgh swells massively during August, to not encounter the worst traits in the general public is pretty impressive, I think. Not to mention, the fun to be had and seriously good tips to be gleaned from chatting to complete strangers. Without doing so I would have missed out on the daft, but extremely enjoyable ‘This is Soap’, not to mention the sublime Luke Wright’s Cynical Ballads.
Graveyard Tour
This doesn’t have anything to do with the Fringe, and can be done any time you visit the city, but I had to give it a mention as we did it on our last night in Edinburgh and it was the perfect way to end our holiday (and contained the zombie squirrels of the title). A mix of historical facts and storytelling, it was a scream (quite literally) and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Our guide (Gerry, with a ‘G’) IS awesome.
I will finish up now with my favourite shows and particularly where the comedians are concerned, if they show up at a venue near you in the future, you should absolutely check them out! I will definitely be making a return visit next year- maybe I’ll see you there?
Joe Wilkinson: My Mum’s Called Stella and My Dad’s Called Brian http://www.ents24.com/web/artist/83311/Joe_Wilkinson.html